What Wounded Souls Need is Not 'Right Answers', but 'Empathy'

Job 5:1 – 7:21

Beloved congregation, the deepest wounds we receive in life often come not from the suffering itself, but when the 'loveless right answers' of those who fail to understand our pain pierce our hearts.

First, 'right words' can sometimes be the 'wrong prescription'. In Chapter 5, Eliphaz delivers a brilliant sermon: "God wounds, but He also binds up. Blessed is the one whom God corrects." These are incredibly true words. However, to Job, who has lost his children and whose body is decaying, this was not comfort but violence. Eliphaz’s logic was a condemnation: "You are being struck because you sinned. Repent quickly."

We often make the mistake of 'Eliphaz'. We try to offer theological answers too quickly to suffering members: "There must be a reason," "Just pray," or "Give thanks." Perhaps religious ministers or those who have been in the faith for a long time are more prone to making such mistakes, as it is easy to clothe ourselves in religious self-righteousness. However, everyone, the Bible tells us that truth without love is merely a clanging cymbal. Thus, Job Chapter 5 warns us: a 'right answer' given in the wrong context only deepens the wound.

Second, the qualification of a friend lies in 'faithfulness (Hesed)'. In Chapter 6, Job cries out, "If only my anguish could be weighed, it would be heavier than the sand of the seas." What Job needed from his friends was not a sermon, but a shoulder to bear the weight of that sand-like pain together. Job criticises his friends as being like 'summer brooks'—streams that overflow when it rains but run completely dry in the scorching dry season when one is truly thirsty.

If we pretend to be friends in good times but turn into cold judges when a friend fails and falls to ruin, we are like those 'dried-up brooks'. A true friend is one who 'weeps with you' before passing judgment. What Job desired was not a logical explanation, but a single word of empathy: "If I were you, it would be truly painful."

Third, prayer is the arena of wrestling with God. In Chapter 7, Job turns his face towards God. But his prayer is shocking. "Lord, what is man that You watch me like a stalker? Will You not let me alone even long enough to swallow my spittle?" Some say this is irreverent. However, "Job is arguing with God, yet he has never left God’s presence." This is genuine faith.

Job did not turn his back on God in his suffering; rather, he is arguing whilst facing God directly. This is 'wrestling prayer'. The deepest prayers are not packaged in lofty language. The scream that vomits out, "God, this is too much, please save me!" is a true prayer. God does not turn away from such rough prayers.

Dear saints, Have you perhaps, like Eliphaz, hastily judged someone and forced 'right answers' upon them? Or are you, like Job, crushed by pain heavier than the sand of the sea?

We have a friend far greater than Job's friends: Jesus Christ. Jesus did not come to us in our suffering to condemn us, saying, "You are suffering because you sinned." Instead, He wept just as we weep, and He bore the weight of suffering on the Cross just as we do.

Worldly friends may disappoint us like 'dried-up brooks'. However, Jesus, the eternal Living Water, will turn our screams into prayers and transform our wounds into evidence that we trusted God to the very end. Rather than forcing yourself to pretend you are fine, pour out your heart to the Lord just as it is, like Job. The Lord accepts that broken spirit.